Flashback

This week I've finally had to acknowledge that my hair is falling out again. I thought it was my imagination at first but no, it's falling out and I feel horrible. What makes it worse is that I'm not even 100 percent raw- I've just been easing into it gradually. I can't figure out what it is I am missing in my diet that would cause my hair to fall out. I'm not losing weight too quickly. My blood tests were all normal except for the high cholesterol. My protein levels are certainly lower than when I was eating meat, but could I really need that much protein to keep myself from losing hair?

Interestingly, when I told my nutritionist about this, and told her (sadly) that I am thinking of adding dairy and fish back into my diet, she seemed to suddenly "come out" about her lack of belief in raw, like she was relieved. Nothing overt, but I could just tell she was all too happy about it! She didn't even suggest anything to help me figure out what the hair loss might stem from. This didn't totally surprise me, as she never seemed to totally understand the raw diet anyway. I guess she was just tolerating it. Still, I benefit from seeing her right now, mainly because knowing I have a nutritionist keeps me focusing on my health, and I like the one-on-one attention better than group meetings like Weight Watchers (whose program I like, by the way). I am thinking of seeing her until I reach my initial 50-lb weight loss goal.

Anyways... the nutritionist told me that one of my problems may be that I am not absorbing enough amino acids, perhaps due to stress. That was a new one on me- why didn't she tell me that before, I wonder. She gave me these B-Complex chewable tablets to try. You eat EIGHT of the nasty things a day, with or without food. They are made of natural ingredients including, unfortunately, soy. She said that taking these will help my body to absorb protein. I figured I'll give it a try. She says she feels a boost of energy when she takes them, but I've never been one to feel more energetic from any particular food except strong coffee (but I don't think of the shakes as energy). I've taken 6 of the vitamins so far and I don't feel a bit different. I have two more to go. Yum.

So, I must say that I am not happy with the way my raw odyssey is going, but that just means I need to rethink things. I do not have to be 100% raw or any particular percentage. My goal is health, so if eating 100% raw vegan isn't healthy for me, then I have to find what is. Until I see evidence that my hair has stopped falling out, I am going to put nonfat cottage cheese, Greek style non-fat yogurt (from Trader Joe's!), and salmon back into my diet. Those, along with hemp, edamame, quinoa, lentils, nuts and seeds will ensure I get a lot more protein than I was getting. I'll keep my calories between 1300 and 1600 daily. Once in a while I will do a whey protein shake. I'll eat plenty of raw fruits and vegetables, drink lots of water, and try to think healthy, happy thoughts. :-)

Worked on the Outside of Me; Tomorrow I Start Work on the Inside!

What a wonderful vacation I had! But now it's back to reality. Of course I completely blew away any idea of a food plan during my vacation. I had Mexican food from a taco shop, ice cream, fried fish, fattening breakfasts, Starbucks frappucinos, Pepsi... I'm sure I've gained 5 pounds, even though I did get some walking in. I don't care, though. It was fun! And now I can get down to business, set some health goals, and go shopping to stock up my kitchen with the good stuff. Since I'm going to continue eating fish even after I start eating a mostly raw diet, I bought an indoor grill. I love grilled salmon fillets! I'll probably even grill veggies from time to time.

My new haircut and clothes made their debut at my job today, where I got some compliments. I thought I looked great compared to my usual lackluster, slouching, "don't look at me" appearance. Feeling good in nice clothing, a chic hairstyle and polished toenails and fingernails is having a positive effect on my self esteem. Appearance isn't everything, but since mine has been a reflection of my lack of self confidence, putting more attention on looking good is helpful to me. So now that I've given some attention to my outsides, I'll be giving nutritional attention to my insides. I see the nutritionist tomorrow!

To Work Out or Not Work Out?

I was able to get close to 2000 calories today because I had a leftover Jimmy John's lunch from yesterday's staff meeting- I just left out the chips this time. However, if I really want to be healthy, that's not the kind of stuff I should be eating twice a week, whether or not it fits into my calories/carbs/protein/fats scheme. It's a high-fat meal, and not the good fat kind. And it's not even vegetarian! Shame on me.

I weighed myself this morning and was very unhappy with the fact that I haven't lost a single pound STILL since last Sunday. Of course, it's not Sunday yet so I'm shouldn't get all excited. If I weigh on Sunday and still haven't lost a single pound, it could mean I'm not eating enough (seems unlikely), I'm eating too much (possibly), I'm retaining water (I don't think so)... Who knows? Guess I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Today is a rest day but I'm fighting the urge to work out. Eating so many calories is what tempts me to go to the gym- I have this urge to burn off the calories. The gym here is open 24 hours so it's easy for me to be spontaneous and run there. However, I don't want to overdo it and hurt myself, or become addicted to the gym.

breakfast
Mangos, 1 cup, sliced
Strawberries, 1 cup
Banana,
Cherry Juice, 4 oz
Protein Powder, 6 tbsp
lunch
Jimmy John's Subs - #1 Pepe,
Chocolate Chip Cookie, 1 serving
dinner
Spinach, fresh, 2 cup
Feta Cheese, 1 oz
Salsa, 0.5 cup
Italian Salad Dressing, 1 tbsp
Atlantic Salmon (fish), 6 oz
Calories Fat Carbohydrates Protein
1,866 75 209 104

Improvements at the Gym

Today I topped out at 3.1 mph on the treadmill. May seem dinky to those of you who have been working out for a while or are just more fit than I am, but I sure was proud! I was able to visualize myself running on the treadmill like I used to do a few years ago. I don't know how long it'll take for me to reach that point, but I'd like to wait until I get to 250 lbs just so I don't do harm to my knees. What made me especially happy about my workout was that I felt truly able to walk at 3.0 mph (3.1 was pushing it); I didn't feel like I was especially tired or out of breath. I can really see progress being made, although the scale has not budged.

I ate A LOT today. As of 7pm I've had over 1, 700 calories without having dinner yet. We had a staff meeting at my job, which normally involves ordering food. Today it was Jimmy John's sub lunch boxes. I had the #4 (turkey) but I ate the chips and the chocolate chip cookie that came in the box, too! I shouldn't have, but I get one "cheat day" a week which I rarely bother to use, plus I rarely eat the number of calories per day my trainer wants me to have per day (2,400) so I think I'll be ok. Besides, I had a great workout. Dinner will be a salad with salmon on it. I'm seeing that adding salmon to my meals has really helped me to raise my calorie count. Salmon has healthy fat in it.

BREAKFAST
Steel Cut Oats, dry, 0.25 cup
Dannon Light & Fit Vanilla, 6 oz
Banana

LUNCH
Jimmy Johns #4 Turkey sub
Campbell's beanw/ bacon
Potato Chips, 1 serving
Chocolate Chip Cookie

DINNER
Atlantic Salmon (fish), 3 oz
Spinach, fresh, 2 cup
Feta Cheese, 1 oz
Salsa, 0.5 cup
Avocado, 1/2
Italian Salad Dressing, 1 tbsp

Calories Fat Carbs Protein
2,196 93 239 92

A Yummy Day

I had another good workout today. I truly meant to make it a “light” day but I get competitive with myself. I want to either burn more calories or go a little further each session. Today I decided to go for the increased calories, so I raised the incline up to 2.5% on the slow songs. But when I peeked at the time on the treadmill and saw that 37 minutes had passed and I had only gone about 1.75 miles, I ramped up the speed a little so I could complete 2 miles in 45 minutes. I still didn’t go over 3 mph, though because I’m supposed to keep my heart rate between 117 and 144.

Since I’m notoriously bad at drinking water (I could seriously go for days without any) I always make sure I drink 16 oz before I return to my car after the workout- at least I get 2 cups in that way. I am trying to get into the habit of drinking some in the morning and evening as well.

After my workout I went to the grocery store to stock up on more fresh salmon. Since I’m not used to cooking for myself- I went from a raw diet to a ghastly fast-food/frozen food diet - I had fun looking up recipes. I used a baked salmon recipe from SparkPeople for a 12-oz piece of salmon with the skin (I always eat the skin!), and I sautéed 4 six-oz fillets using a tiny bit of olive oil in a non-stick pan. While I was baking and sautéing I was also steaming broccoli in a makeshift steamer made of a steel strainer and a stock pot. The house smelled so good! The reason I steamed the broccoli is that I don’t like raw broccoli- never have. But it’s a good vegetable to have on hand.

I made an unfortunate discovery: those three salmon fillets I had previously were really SIX ounces each, not three ounces!! See what happens when you don’t have a food scale, boys and girls? The good news, however, is that on those days I was about 150 calories closer to the 2,400 calories my trainer wants me to consume daily. (I have ensured that I will not have this problem again by buying a food scale).

So I had a great workout, a huge dinner with vegetables, drank a little more water than usual, and feel great! I will weigh myself tomorrow morning (if I remember).

breakfast:
Mangos, 1 cup, sliced
Banana
Cherry Juice, 4 oz
Blackberries, fresh, 0.5 cup
Whey Protein Powder
lunch:
Campbell's bean w/bacon soup
dinner:
Baked Salmon, 4 oz
Broccoli, steamed, 1 cup
Spinach, fresh, 2 cup
Feta Cheese, 1 oz
Salsa, 0.5 cup
Avocados, 1/2
Italian Salad Dressing, 1 tbsp
Brown Rice, long grain, 1 cup

CALORIES CARBS FAT PROTEIN
1,694 235 51 88