Yay- I like My Nutritionist!!

My visit to the nutritionist felt pretty good. I am optimistic about her supporting a gradual switch from my current diet to a vegetarian one, then to a mostly raw one. My personal goal is to lose 50 lbs before the end of the year (she thinks I can do it before Thanksgiving) and then to focus more on feeling better physically and emotionally as I get healthier. The nutritionist's goal is to support me in doing this as healthfully as possible, both from a physical and emotional standpoint.

Today the nutritionist weighed and measured me (yuck, and yuck). She gave me quite a few handouts to read about particular nutrients, healthful foods, the dangers of Pepsi (sigh...) and other things based on my diet history and our discussion about my current health. She wants me to go get my bloodwork done as soon as possible so she can use that as a guide for a food plan. I could tell that I was baffling her with my lack of visible enthusiasm but I've been kinda depressed these days. She handled it pretty well. I like her and think she'll be good to talk to about topics like emotional eating, eating disorders, frustrations with weight loss, low self esteem, etc. It's kinda like having a therapist dealing with the main problem I have: using food for everything. I've tried therapy before and although I liked the therapist, I think counseling about eating habits might be a better way for me to approach the issues that lead me to overeat. On the other hand, I know from my raw days that when I'm eating raw, I don't have the cravings and compulsions I deal with now, so....? Is the problem emotional or physical? I believe it's mostly physical but that I've been brainwashed to believe it's mostly emotional (hence the mental self-flagellation). At any rate, I'm not going to confuse her with an actual therapist, but I know she'll be pushing some emotional buttons as we work together. How can she not?

Based on the foods I told her I'm eating right now we came up with menus for breakfasts, lunches and dinners, which she made sure were balanced with the right proportions of protein, starches, vegetables, and fruits. Stuff like coffee with creamer will go into an "Other" category, although I'll try to keep that category to a minimum (even my beloved Pepsi can go into the Other). I don't count calories- she does that. You know, even though I'm paying an arm and a leg for this service, it still feels like a luxury to have someone else put my meals together and count the calories and nutrients. All I do is say, "no" or "yes" as she rattles off food suggestions, and she writes up the menu and totals the nutrients. She even made a grocery list for me. I love it. Maybe this is what Oprah feels like!

So I've got a whole folder of stuff to read before I see her again next week. I'll be able to contact her for assistance via the internet daily if I need information or emotional support. I'm to email my food journal to her online regularly and then we'll go over it weekly in person. She'll weigh and measure me to ensure I am not losing "lean" rather than the "adipose tissue" (fat) I'm trying to get rid of. I told her that this weekend I'm on vacation in California and that I do not intend to follow a food plan. She pretty much laughed that one off and showed me how I really could follow the plan pretty easily and possibly even lose weight this weekend. I'm still not planning to follow the plan- so who's got the last laugh now, Ms. Nutritionist? Huh? Oh, you do?
Never mind.

SHORT ANALYSIS

PROS
1) If I don't lose weight this month she'll be right there advising me; I won't feel so alone in this struggle.
2) She's knowledgeable, has a good sense of humor, lots of patience, and much enthusiasm
3) Supports my whole/raw food plans
4) Is practical and realistic about my making lifestyle changes, not "weight-loss changes"

CONS
1) Sure costs a lot of money
2) Really expensive
3) Did I mention I pay a lot for this?

Clothing Therapy

I've taken a little break from my healthy menu and workouts to indulge in my naughty little food treats (you saw that coming, didn't you?) It was fun but, as usual, it's always more fun eating fast food and junk than dealing with the aftermath- the stomach aches, etc. I probably wouldn't have bothered to eat those foods if I hadn't had the nutritionist appointment coming up! Fortunately, I know that next week I will be rejuvenated in my quest for health and fitness because of my new, personalized health plan. I will be meeting with the nutritionist THREE DAYS A WEEK in July. If things go well and I can afford it, I will sign up for August as well.

The nutritionist sent me a packet of documents to fill out. It asks for your measurements and weight, a basic health history, your nutritional goals, as well as questions regarding past/present eating disorders. They recommend you see a doctor before starting their program. They have a personal trainer who does a weight routine, but I can't cough up an extra $150 for him right now. I definitely want to start weight training soon, though.

Next weekend I'm spending time with a friend in California who is going to go clothes shopping with me. I really need clothing therapy! Because I hate shopping for clothes I tend to grab from the rack whatever is in my size. If it fits, great. If it's a tad too big that's great, too. If it's too small I might hang on to it or I might return it. But I never try on a series of outfits (and I never buy feminine-looking clothes because I'd really have to try those on!) Nope, I'm all slacks, t-shirts and button-down blouses. I have one dressy shirt, one pair of dress slacks, and one boxy jacket. The rest is all sporty casual and definitely not me.

My friend will help me to buy some stylish clothes, sizes 26/28, that look best on the body I've got right now. This is therapy for me because I hate to acknowledge that I've gained so much weight. To me, clothes shopping is nothing but a reminder of what I've done to myself. However, I know that when I feel good about my clothes, I have more self-confidence and a much more positive attitude throughout the day. I remember fondly the nice outfits I used to put together before I gained all of this weight. Nothing expensive, or trendy- just quality clothes that were tailored, had some personality, and fit me nicely. These days my fashion statement is "don't notice me, please." So I'm gonna work on changing that. I don't think I should wait until I get smaller to start dressing better, although I must say that spending money on clothes when I'm losing weight is very hard for me to do. I hate wasting hard-earned money. I have to rethink that attitude: spending money on something that makes me feel better about myself shouldn't be considered a waste!